littles write to sorority sugar with sad stories about problems with their beloved bigs. don’t be one of those girls! high expectations come along with the role of big sister, so make sure you are on top of your game as a BIG!
❀ A “MODEL” BIG IS ALWAYS……
1. …doing her duty: being a big sister is a call to duty and a blessed obligation, not just a casual flight of fancy. littles take it very seriously. even if you don’t click with your little, or you take another little, or you get busy with other things ~ you still have a duty to follow through with your big requirements. it’s an honor. even when you don’t feel like it.
2. …generous: the ideal big is generous of spirit, time and gifties. giving your little undivided attention is #1. one-on-one time should be a priority. share your smiles, your advice, your love and your humor whenever you can. text, call, post and just hang out. being together doesn’t need to be expensive. gifts don’t have to break the bank either. CRAFT, buy on sale and get creative with no-cost gestures. thoughtfulness isn’t about money.
3. …a role model: no matter what her age, your little looks up to you. to her, you are the ideal sorority sister. you need to live your chapter’s values and be a prime example of what it’s like to be a member of your sorority. if you are a MIA, or a crazy hot mess, how does that reflect on your entire sisterhood? live your creed!
4. …aware of the twins trap: taking multiple littles is a potentail recipe for distater. only the bravest bigs should venture into this territory. don’t do it on a whim. all of a sudden you have double the trouble, and maybe double the love (if you’re lucky). hopefully you’re skilled enough to maintain peaceful family relations. it’s a tightrope walk of sibling rivalry, divided time and conflicting attention. if you take more than one little be prepared!
5. …full of surprises: the best bigs do things for their littles when they least expect it. when your little has a tough exam, bring her a goodie basket. treat her to a surprise concert ticket, or a spure of the moment shopping trip. attend her dance production, sports game, or political debate ~ just to show your support. sneak notes & treats into her room, gift her some freebies from work, bake her favorite cookies ~ all for no special reason.
6. …remembering everything: as an ideal big, you should never forget your little’s birthday, college major, hometown, favorite color, favorite foods, boyfriend, career goals, etc. knowing her “life schedule” is also a great idea. for example, know when she travels abroad, when she serves as maid of honor in her sister’s wedding, when she’s going to the fraternity formal… all of these events should be celebrated with a thoughtful ’best wishes’ from you. remembering costs nothing and means so much!
7. …looking out for her little: when rough times come you need to have your little’s back. whether it’s trouble within the chapter, with other sorority girls, guy problems, family issues or personal problems ~ a big should be supportive and loyal. defend your little in the face of criticism, betrayal or tragedy. in tough times we find out who are real friends are. be that real friend.
8. …expecting the best: if your little is not living up to her potential, or going down the wrong path, a model big will have the nerve to talk to her about what’s going on. expect the best from your little. if she becomes a chronic standards violation, develops an eating disorder, slacks off in her studies, sleeps around, or drinks too much… don’t just look the other way. a honest heart-to-heart with your little is the first step in helping her get back on course.
9. …non-competitive: girls are naturally competitive with other girls. your job is to not be this way with your little. hands off the guy she likes, the exec board position she’s been dying to try, the gown she wants to wear to formal, or the perfect bikini that would look better on you! choose another guy, another leadership job, another fancy dress and another bathing suit. be the bigger person and avoid all sisterly showdowns.
10. …a rock: the perfect big is there to listen and listen some more. a shoulder to cry on. a greek life tour guide. a partner in crime. a buddy. a comedian. a pseudo mom. an honest friend when others aren’t. reliable. the sister you will know forever.
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